Monday, January 17, 2011

Ping Pong Couponing

Ping Pong.

I have fond memories of that sport since we had a ping pong table in our enclosed patio when I was a kid. Other kids from around the neighborhood would gather and play and the early evenings after supper were punctuated by the sound of the paddles smacking the ping pong balls. However, all was not sweetness and light. I still remember when the kid we called The Monk, who had what we would now call Anger Management problems, would often turn bright red with rage when he narrowly lost and would frequently smash open the ping pong balls with his paddle. Once he even tossed a ping pong ball into his mouth and began angrily chewing on it.

Ping Pong even featured in diplomacy since Red China first opened itself up to the USA by inviting the American Ping Pong team into that sealed nation. At the time legend had it that Senators Spong and Fong sponsored a bill to recognize this diplomatic effort by the mass ringing of church to mark the arrival of the American Ping Pong team in Hong Kong following its tour of China. Supposedly it was called the Spong-Fong Hong Kong Ping Pong Ding Dong Bell Bill.

Yes...I know, I know. By now you are angrily screaming "Enough with this Ping Pong shtick! Teach me how to save a bundle of money via Ping Pong couponing. Well here goes...

Today was a perfect example. All you needed for Ping Ponging entry to a veritable mountain of FREE riches in great Walgreens stuff was just 4 bucks. And that was the $4 you paid for 4 boxes of Sinex Nyquil (and Dayquil) on sale for $5 each. Then you apply four $4 Sinex coupons to each box and your net cost is that $4 entry fee I told you about. Okay, great. For just four bucks you get 4 Sinex Nyquil/Dayquil boxes worth 20 bucks but what has that got to do with Ping Pong Couponing? Well, notice that I mentioned that the total was worth $20. As it turns out, this month Walgreens is giving customers $10 in Register Rewards for every $20 of Vicks products purchased. Note that you don't actually need to shell out 20 bucks. That is the original value which you have just discounted down to $4 that you pay Out Of Pocket (OOP).

That $10 in Register Rewards represents the "PING" in this round. To get the amazing Pong return, just apply that $10 Register Rewards to a 20 oz bottle of Joint Juice selling, coincidentally, for $10 which means you pay NOTHING. Best of all, there is a return "PONG" serve of $10 Register Rewards generated by that bottle of Joint Juice for which you paid NOTHING OOP since you used the "PING" Register Rewards generated by the Sinex boxes.

Now we come to the truly amazing part of this particular couponing Ping Pong game. When you use the "PONG" register rewards to pay for another 4 boxes of Sinex (on which you will use 4 more Sinex coupons worth $4 each) you will have SIX dollars left over. What to do? What to do? Hey, I'll tell you what to do. You will add a Gillette Power Pro-Glide Fusion Razor. It is on sale for $9.99 and after you apply the $6 still left on your Register Rewards (be sure to add a small filler) you have gotten not only 4 boxes of Sinex Nyquil (and/or Dayquil) which will generate yet another $10 in register rewards but also that razor. But wait...THERE'S MORE.!!!

That FREE Gillette Razor which you will also be getting in that "PING" transaction generates another $5 in Register Rewards so the return ball is even more powerful since it is now worth $15 total in Register Rewards. Now all you have to do is go back and forth in this transaction. Each round of PING PONG couponing will generate $25 of Register Rewards. Twenty dollars you use to buy the Vicks boxes, Gillette razors, and Joint Juice and $5 more generated from the Gillette razor in Register Rewards to use any way you want. After just five back and forth rounds you get $200 worth of stuff almost free (just pay sales tax and for fillers) PLUS you will have $25 worth of extra Register Rewards with which to splurge on whatever you want at Walgreens.

My last round of Ping Pong Couponing today was quite fun. There were two registers I could have gone to for checkout. One register had a Darth Vader type of guy. Nix on that. The other register had an absolutely humorless cashier. Perfect! Why? Because I knew that after dealing with me she would always do her utmost to get me the hell out of there as fast as possible. Here is what happened:

I got to the cashier and began dancing in place and singing something like "I'm doing the Walgreens shuffle! One-Two! Ping-Pong!"

By then the humorless cashier was rolling her eyes and informed me that because I handed her a register rewards for the Joint Juice, I wouldn't be getting any Register Rewards which I knew to be incorrect so I continued dancing and singing:

"The Coupon Whisperer is correct 99.7% of the time. My infallibility is almost total!"

So I am sort of dance hopping in place when the Catalina machine mocked the humorless cashier by spitting out a $10 Register Rewards. The Coupon Whisperer made it worse for the cashier by dancing in place in an even more exaggerated manner and pumping his arms in victory:

"Yes! Yes! Yes! BOOM-SHAKA-LAKA...BOOM SHAKA-LAKA..BOOM! And now, Ladies and Gentlemen, the grand finale of the Walgreens two-step!"

I handed the FOUR boxes of Sinex AND the Gillette Power Pro-Glide Fusion Razor along with a small filler to the humorless cashier who by now seemed to want nothing more than to escape from whatever planet The Coupon Whisperer was on.

"Bring it on! Bring it on! Bring it on to The Coupon Whisperer!" I sang as she rang up my items along with the coupons and the $10 Register Rewards generated by the Joint Juice. I stopped dancing and squatted down to eye level while talking directly to the Catalina machine:

"Bring it home to PAPA! Bring it home to PAPA!"

Suddenly the Catalina machine began furiously spitting out the $10 generated Register Rewards by the Vicks followed by another $5 generated by the Gillette Razor.

"Yeah, baby! Oh YEAH! Oooooh that felt sooooo good! Was it good for you? It was good for me!"

The humorless cashier couldn't take it any longer. She split the scene leaving a few people waiting for another cashier. But you know what? If I ever get that humorless cashier again, there is no doubt that she will do everything in her power to get me checked out quickly. And, okay, I have to admit that it was fun to tweak her. Hey, you gotta have FUn when you're out couponing.

I hope this has been instructive in getting you on the road to Ping Pong Couponing. I also scored 2 packs of FREE Wild Lox Salmon, a couple of bags of FREE Lenders bagels (or "bah-glez" as my wife pronounces it), and salmon spread cream cheese (also FREE). However that was via another method than Ping Pong Couponing known as "MM" but that is a subject for a future lesson, boys and girls.

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